Well, it's that time again. Where I finally kick my ass into gear and update this journal.

This country is a vampire that's slowly draining me of myself; I feel like my personality is being sucked out of me, a little at a time. Life consists of work, gym, watching movies. Work, gym, playing video games. Swish, rinse, and repeat. Then do it again. Then, just when you can't stand it anymore, do it another time. I feel like I am turning into a walking, talking vegetable. The most exciting part of my day, other than when we're on the road, is wondering what's going to happen to Jack Bauer in the next episode of "24."

Basically, life consists of a few moments of excitement that you really, really don't want, surrounded on both sides by boredom. Thank god for the gym, or I would go completely insane. It gives me some kind of goal that I can strive for, and let's me see SOME kind of good change in myself.

Oh, and thank god for XBOX, too.
and Halo
and boobs.

It's been a while since I've updated this - we've been pretty busy around here. We've had a lot of big moves with the boss and whatnot.

The other day was a particularly interesting one, and I'll share what happened. We got an Op Order saying that we were to take the Boss to a particular venue in the red zone, which was located in a relatively hostile area. They briefed us on the possible routes, and the way that it works is that there's a green(most preferred), yellow, and red (least preferred) route - basically just a Plan A, B, and C. This was an area that I was totally unfamiliar with, and was unfriendly, and my job is to learn the routes so that we don't end up getting lost in a hostile area. That is kind of stressful at times, knowing that your whole convoy is depending on you not to make any wrong turns in an area where you've never been.We took the green route, since it was an easy shot up to the venue, and it was through the "friendliest" territory of the three routes.

So we rolled out, and right from the get-go things started to go wrong. The whole idea of our mission is to get the boss from one place to another without stopping or slowing down, but as soon as we went out the checkpoint we got stuck behind a convoy of stryker vehicles (these big armored sons of bitches that look like the amphibious duck tours vehicles you see in the city) that were driving about 5 MPH, and we had no way to get around them because of how narrow the roads are where we were. Finally they turned off, and all we had to worry about was civilian traffic. Luckily, the civilians are used to the game at this point, and know to get the hell out of the way for us. Being in the city sucks, though, because the cars get so close that you have no stand-off distance, and escalation of force is a joke. Also, in the city, a lot of the drivers are assholes (just like home!) and just don't care. Some are also dumb, and just don't pay attention. Our best tool is throwing water bottles, because it lets them know we want them out of the way and that the next step is shooting at them. Curll's arm got a good workout that day.

We ended up making pretty good time up until the last intersection before the bridge. When we got there, however, was when our real problems started. The Iraqi Police had blocked off the other side of the road, so all of the traffic that was supposed to be over there was now on our side of the road, coming at us - and it was backed up at a dead stop for half a mile or so. So we had to start pushing it out of the way, inching through it. That part really was pretty stressful - from a work standpoint, we were almost at a dead stop, when we were never supposed to stop moving because we had the boss with us. Also, though, was the fact that we were surrounded by cars, and had nowhere to go - and everyone around us was giving us the Death-Look and swearing and yelling at us. We finally inched our way to the end of that backup, only to find that the bridge we were about to go over had the same problem. We began making the cars on the bridge clear a path for us, and made it about halfway down before we really got hung up. There was a minibus that had no more room to pull forward, so we gave it maybe fifteen seconds to find a way. It couldn't, so I made the call to push it out of the way, because we had to get moving. We ended up ripping its rear bumper off, messing up our driver's side mirror, and leaving a big blue streak down the side of our humvee.

We finally got across the bridge, and linked up with our advance element, who had cleared traffic at some traffic circles for us, and was there to wave us in the right direction. Once we pulled into the venue, it was quiet for the most part, other than someone taking a few sporadic shots at one of our vehicles (luckily whoever it was couldn't aim!). When we left, the call was made for us to take the Red Route on the trip back. This was not surprising, given the traffic on the green route, but it was disconcerting, since they specifically told us that the Red Route was least desirable, and that almost every convoy that has gone through that area lately has been attacked. Fortunately we were not attacked, and made it the rest of the way home without incident - it was just an interesting day.

I think someone stole my guitar in the mail! Those bastards, lol! It was sent weeks and weeks ago, and I've gotten tons of mail that was sent way later. I've lost hope haha. I'll just have to buy a new one or something.

Things are going well here. The old unit has gone home, and we have taken over completely. Everyone's been pretty busy settling into their jobs, but everyone's been doing very well. I'm with a great bunch of guys who all know their jobs, and we all look out for each other. Don't stress out too much about it being dangerous. We've had several scary situations, but we haven't been directly attacked yet. Iraq is nothing like they portray it to be on the news. So far all of the people that I've encountered have been very happy to have us here, and one kid even ran up and gave me a hug. Don't believe everything you hear on the news. Yes, the reasons behind the war initially may have been fucked up, but we ARE doing good here, and giving a lot of people hope.
I've got internet access now, so feel free to drop me emails and whatnot.

In Baghdad at last. The area where we're living is really nice, and the food at the chow hall is awesome. I must be brief, because I'm using my counterpart's computer until they move out of their trailers and we move in. I just wanted to post something so that mom and dad would know I'm ok. I've only had the chance to make one phone call because we've been so busy, and we don't have much access to phone/internet yet. Once I move into my trailer, I'll be able to call home much more often. Anyways, I love you guys and I'll keep you updated.

This place really isn't so bad. Here at our temporary stopover in Kuwait they have several rec rooms w/ internet, linked xboxes, and plenty of tvs to watch dvds, plus a theater tent, plus several internet cafes, a burger king, kfc, taco bell, and subway. Needless to say, we are all having a good time since we are used to the retardedness of FOB Tiger on Fort Dix.

The heat here really doesn't bother me as much as I thought it would. It's been between 118-130 the past few days, but it's really not that bad. I would take 130 here in Kuwait over 98 at Fort Dix any day. Here there is no humidity at all, so you don't feel trapped in your own skin. It's more like being at the beach on a really hot and clear day, except the wind burns instead of cools. The only weird thing is that for the first day or so, my eyes dried up like crazy from all the hot wind. They've adjusted to it though, so it's not such a big deal.

I talked to a guy from the unit we're replacing who is here to teach some classes to us, and he gave us the scoop on the place we'll be living. It really doesn't sound bad at all, as far as living conditions go, so I'm very glad about that. At any rate, I am off to go take a nap.

Well friends and neighbors, we're in theater at last. I have to keep this brief because my friend is done and we need someone else to go anywhere. The desert is unbelievable. You can't even imagine how much nothingness there really is until you see it with your own eyes. We'll hopefully be in Iraq soon, but I will try and keep everyone up on the situation. Just wanted people to know we made it safe.
-M

The past two weeks have been both the best and worst parts of the deployment so far. It was really really really awesome to spend a week at home with Sarah. We spent the entire week together, and it really bolstered our confidence in the strength of our relationship and gave us a really positive attitude about the months to come. It was really one of the best weeks we've had together. My family was also very supportive of me, but I can tell that it's hard on my mom to see me go to war.

The major problem with having six days of leave is that it's just long enough to become reaccustomed to normal life. The first day or two it's weird (but awesome :-p) sleeping with someone else again, but by the fourth day it feels weird to think about sleeping alone. I know it's a long time from now, but I can't wait to come home and get my life back to normal. I miss college and my friends, and most of all, my family and fiance.

I am starting to feel a little anxious, but that's just because we leave tomorrow. I just need to get this plane ride out of the way.

Getting pretty fed-up with the bullshit around this place (i.e. putting up with a set of retarded rules set forth by a bunch people who have never been to Iraq), but we're on the home stretch at least. I just want to get the hell out of Dodge and get in country to where we'll be living for the next year. There we'll be able to look forward to wireless internet, a pool, an awesome gym 50 meters from where we sleep, 2 man rooms (instead of 15 man tents), getting to walk around the FOB without IBA (Interceptor Body Armor), kevlar helmet, or rifle, and actually having some free time to chill out in our air conditioned rooms.
Here we have about 5 minutes of free time a day (except on days like today that are weapons/tent/vehicle maintenance days), barely any time to shower, and we have to listen to pogues at Fort Dix who have never been in country telling us we have to ride around in full battle rattle with our windows UP in 100+ degree heat, when all humvees that are actually in Iraq have air conditioning and these don't. Another favorite Fort Dix rule is that any time we are outside of our tents (which are about 110 degrees on days like today) we have to be in full battle rattle (body armor with full combat load of ammo, our rifle and helmet, which altogether weigh something like 50 pounds. That's a 3rd of my bodyweight lol). In country, when you are on the FOB you only need to have a 9mm pistol and 1 magazine of ammo on you and you don't have to be in full battle rattle.
The major issue here is that Fort Dix is basically a joke, and most of this pre-mobilization training is pointless. It's all here to make the big-wigs at Fort Dix look good, and to make the training here look tough and demanding. Everyone that works here and teaches classes here admits that this is nothing like being in-country, yet the higher-ups tout the training here as being "Theater Immersion Training." Everyone knows it's a joke, but no one cares.
The biggest irony of all is the Army's patented "After Action Review." The AAR is designed to improve training/exercises/events by getting feedback from those involved (i.e. improves/sustains). Here at Fort Dix, they make us do about 5 AARs a day, but no one listens to a damn word of it. I guarantee that every unit that comes through here makes exactly the same complaints/suggestions, but no one listens. They just put the AARs on paper so they can say they did one. And let's not even talk about Risk Assessments, because if I have to listen to one more Risk Assessment for sitting in an air conditioned classroom I'm going to kill everyone.

Sorry if it sounds like I'm bitching, but I am. :)
It just builds up on you some days.

Well I haven't had much time to update this lately - and it's 2 am as we speak, so I will be brief. I was finally made Team Leader, taking the spot of the other sergeant who was not up to the responsibilities. We've been doing convoy operations this week, and they've been going really well. My team is awesome - I really love the two guys I have with me in my truck, and I trust one of them more than anyone else in my squad.

3 more weeks of training, then standing by to hear about a trip home before the big vacation. Miss you, Monkey!

-M

I'm feeling kind of down this afternoon. We came back to the rear to do laundry, clean weapons, go to the PX, and chill out (which was much needed). I felt good earlier in the day, but things just randomly kind of tapered off. The time is going by, and everything is becoming easier to deal with as we cement our friendships together, but something inside of me that is supposed to be there just isn't today. Either that, or maybe it's just that part catching up to the rest of me after disappearing for a while. It's not exactly sadness, and not depression, but there's this weird layer of melancholy just below the surface.

I think maybe it's because I have no guitar to vent to. My brain is naturally connected to my limbs through my nerves, and this allows it motor function. I feel like my guitar is naturally connected to my brain through my limbs so that it can express itself, and without that it feels like something has been severed.